Introductions...

I guess i should begin by introducing myself. I am a 29 year old female recently diagnosed with acute lymphocytic leukemia. I am also a wife and mother to two beautiful baby boys. A friend recommended starting a blog as a way to pass the time spent in the hospital as well as a way to channel my emotions. So...i guess i'll give it a try.

My rollarcoaster of emotions actually began about 8 months ago when my husband and i found out we were pregnant. We couldn't have been happier and It couldn't have been more perfect timing. I had just finished graduate school two weeks prior. Life really seemed to be fitting into place. Then about a month later (at 10 weeks preggo) i began having these unexplained high fevers that eventually lead to a decrease in my blood counts. I spent 2.5 weeks in hospital, had numerous blood transfusions and two bone marrow biopsies that were both inconclusive. The doctor at that time felt i should abort the pregnancy cause in his opinion something was terribly wrong. But i didn't want too. I wanted so bad to have these babies (yes i found out i was having not one but two babies). It's amazing how attached you can feel to something you've never met in such a short amount of time. So, i decided to put it in God's hands. After about 2 weeks, the fevers subsided, my counts miraculously started to return to normal, and the babies were found to be healthy via ultrasound.

I was monitored closely for the next few weeks and everything seemed fine. I even returned to work as i had been out on leave for about 7 weeks. Everything was going great until December 21st when i again started with the unexplained fevers that would lead to the drop in blood counts. I spent christmas and new years in the hospital. Nothing could prepare me for the news i received on new years day. The doctor came in and told me that the most recent bone marrow biopsy done a few days earlier was inconclusive but he felt strongly it was a leukemia and i needed to deliver the babies immediately and be started on chemotherapy. At this time i was 25 weeks pregnant and knew if the babies were delivered they would not have a great chance at survival. I was devastating. I prayed for God to give me a few more weeks. I said that if the twins could just reach 28 weeks i would be happy. Not knowing what to do with me, the doctors transferred me to another hospital in the area (an academic setting with a high risk OB group). When i arrived at this other hospital, i was thrilled to learn that my new doctor did not feel it was an emergency to take out the babies or be started on any chemotherapy. At this point, my numbers were coming up on their own as they had last time and the fevers were completely gone. I was once again monitored closely and was doing really well.

March 2, 2010....by far one of the most memorable days of my life. My miracle baby boys were brought into this world. I had gone into preterm labor but was 32 weeks pregnant and felt confidant the boys would do well if delivered. I had to have an emergency c-section because the twins were not positioned the right way but otherwise had an uncomplicated delivery. Gabriel Joseph born at 0723 weighed 4lb 1 oz and Giovanni Richard born at 0724 weighed 3lb 14oz. Both completely healthy. The boys only had to stay in the NICU for 2 weeks before being allowed to come home. They never required oxygen or a tube to feed.

The boys were only home for 4 days when i started having my fever episodes again. When another bone marrow biopsy was suggested, i agreed not really expecting to get a clear diagnosis. I just expected another inconclusive result and was hoping these weird episodes were some sort of strange pregnancy related issue but no such luck...here we are today: a week and a half post-leukemia diagnosis.